Six years ago tonight, Robbie left us and his absence remains keenly felt.
The other night, Deb and I were walking the dogs and she said, “Six years” and I replied, “I always find myself dwelling on the bad times, not the good ones.” I wish I knew why that was but all week long I reimagine that long, final day.
Once Robbie was intubated early that morning, he went to sleep and never woke up, unaware how the hospital staff rallied to keep him alive for Kate and the family to gather around to make their farewells. The room was filled with supportive nurses, sitting with us, then Deb’s priests, and finally, one by one, siblings and his grandmother.
Since then, the bonds forged throughout the ordeal have changed. Some of the nurses stay in touch with sporadic Facebook posts. We have obviously forged ahead, but continue to ask ourselves, “What if?” Would we have relocated to Maryland had he still been here? Would he have come to love this movie or TV show the way we have?
He’s certainly not been forgotten. Two weeks ago over a dozen people participated in Shore Leave’s memorial Texas Hold’em Poker Tournament and we await a final tally for how much was donated to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. We’re told there were three luminary candles in his memory at Fairfield’s Relay for Life.
While we’ve filled our days and carried on, he’s never far from my thoughts, especially this week. His presence is felt and his infectious nature and high energy is truly missed. We’re really going to feel it in September at Kate’s wedding where he would have won his tux and top hat, dancing with abandon.
You are so missed, kid.