11 Years

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Last year was tough. A decade is a solid block of time. Notthat eleven years is any lighter, but doesn’t have the same psychic weight.


We continue living a day at a time, often getting stopped inour tracks by music, a line from a movie, a reference overheard. All bring backmemories of Robbie.

Time certainly helps, but will never erase the pain andsense of loss.

For whatever reason, this year I have watched peers and friends lose spouses and I offer whatever comfort and experience I can from a distance. We’re also at that stage of life where we’re all watching members of the older generation disappear. Our parents are aging, others passing away, so the presence of death feels stronger these days than in the past.

None of which dims the bright memories of Robbie. His buoyantspirit and the pleasure he gave others with his antics. He knew how to make themost of a moment, leaving an indelible impression on all who knew him,

As legacies go, it’s not a bad one. But I’d trade it all to have him back.

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10 thoughts on “11 Years

  1. Love you, “Admiral.” Your words ring too true as I continue to experience much loss, and terrible sorrow, and all I can cling to are bright memories of better times shared with those I love, but lost. I can only take comfort in my faith that holds the promise that we will be reunited with our lost loved ones in the not-too-distant future. Of course, not everyone believes, not in the way to which I refer. But they, too, are in for a very, very pleasant surprise. Carry on, my friend. The depth of our love is measured by the grief that lingers as much as the fond memories. And that is also a good thing.

  2. As I read this and saw the picture of Robbie and how much he looks like you. I smiled. Sometimes we are only given a limited time but that time is precious and is what we hold onto. The loss of a child is truly my worst nightmare. I lost my brother 10 days after my wedding 27 years ago. I still feel like it was yesterday. I wish you all the best as try to survive such a tragedy. The way I survived my brothers loss is to talk to him. Maybe it’s for my own sanity or maybe just maybe he is out there. I know it brings me a little sense of peace. Best Ken

  3. Robbie fought an amazing battle. I knew him as a little boy, then as a fighter and was sooo impressed by his strength. He will never be forgotten!! Ginny

  4. Thinking of you. WOW i’m looking at you from way back when (high school). He will always be with you. Hugs.

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